The Queen – or the Goddess?

Once upon a time, in a faraway kingdom, lived a beautiful, wise Queen and a strong, just King. They were famous for their powerful love-connection. They would not do anything without the other, and the world was astonished at them, as nothing had managed to separate them, or to make them doubt each other. Their love was an example, and it would illumine the whole sky. When they were side by side, praying, or solving quarrels, people could see a great aura of light being emanated from their chest. It was a sign that they were divine. Everybody knew that, but nobody had the courage to utter it out loud.

In that abundant and peaceful kingdom, there was a prominent witch, living alone in the creepy, shadowy forests. Nobody really knew anything specific about her, but it was said that she sometimes appeared unto certain people, and that they would never be the same afterwards. One day, the King received a special request from one of his subjects: an old lady asked permission for a private meeting. That was very unusual, as before, the Kind would judge the cases with his Queen. Nobody actually believed that the King was going to accept the request, but he did.

The Queen’s face became dark, for the first time, and the flame in her heart started to quickly diminish. She felt very weak, and a vague sensation of doubt crawled inside o her heart, like a cold-blooded snake alluring her, and biting her. Still, while the King was in the meeting with that mysterious woman, the Queen admonished herself for her venomous suspicion, and she asked heaven for forgiveness. So, her inner light was restored, and she felt again peaceful and confident. Her husband was a man to trust, for sure!

When the King exited the meeting room, his face was dim, his eyes – teary, and around his heart area, where once was only a bright light, a sort of magical rust was now visible. All his subjects were appalled at the sight of this, and rumours emerged, and the Queen found out about them, before the King got to meet her. The Queen was a bit scared, but she decided, inwardly, that she will maintain the faith in her husband. After a while, the King came into the Queen’s chambers, and he kissed her on her sweet, red lips, but something had changed in him, and the beautiful Queen knew.

He did not give any explanations, and she did not ask – as she did not want to trouble him, or pain him. Days passed, and a cold emotional distance installed between the King and the Queen. The King became gloomy and reserved, and he commenced to avoid the Queen and her presence. The Queen would hide in her rooms, because she did not want to give people the opportunity to gossip, but the kingdom was roaring about these sad events!

The inflaming sun went to sleep, and woke up again, and this cycle was repeated many times. The King, now, was not spreading light around him, and his heart was completely rusted. He became thin and pale, although he wanted to appear as strong as before. He became disinterested in the state affairs, and he would spend a lot of time into the woods, hunting. People were saying that the evil witch had put a spell on him, and that she had charmed him, so that he would forget the Queen. But the queer thing was that the more he ignored the Queen, the sicker he would look. A scary rumour spread in the palace that determined the Queen to wake up from her lethargy. They said that the King is going to die soon.

The Queen was in a great dilemma. What should a woman do in this case? She knew that she had to do something, but she did not know what. When a woman is forgotten by her man, she cannot do anything. A woman who loves her man – also respects his decisions. But this was more than a sentimental thing. People needed their King. The kingdom was falling apart, rapidly. Famine had spread all over the land! What could she do, as a Queen? Nothing, again! She could not dethrone the King, because she loved him.

The Queen went to sleep, and on a full-moon night, she had an amazing dream. In her reverie, she was in the woods, all by herself, and she saw a woman coming towards her. First, she got scared, but then, her inner voice told her to stand still. When the strange woman approached, the Queen observed that her eyes were glowing like flames. The old woman, who was in fact the ancient witch, took the Queen’s hand into her own, and told her, in a very soft and comforting tone: “You are not only a woman, or a queen, you are also a goddess. What would a goddess do?”

The Queen woke up with renewed strength. She now knew what to do: she needed to go into the woods, and look up for that old woman. A woman cannot do much; a queen – the same. But a goddess can do everything – everything she wants! And she desired so much to heal her King, and to restore order in the kingdom!

She did not tell anyone about her plan, and she just left the palace, and entered the thick, scary woods. She expected to meet the outstanding witch, but she did not. Tired by walking, she got near a calm lake, and just sat down. She approached and drank some water that was so clear and refreshing that she thought she had found the rivers of life. When she was preparing to leave, she saw in the water the image of the old lady, but her heart was open wide, bleeding. She got scared and ran back to the palace.

She tried to understand what she saw in the mirror of the lake, but she could not think of any satisfactory answer. What does the image of the old woman with the heart open-wide mean? After three weeks, she had an amazing insight. The old lady signified her own existence. She was the old woman, with the bleeding open-heart. But why was her heart bleeding?

She already knew the answer: yes, hear heart was bleeding. And the King was not the reason, but she was – her own hidden fears. She had wondered, so many times, is she is fit to be a queen; if, one day, the King will meet another woman, more beautiful than her, and fell in love. For many years, she had secretly tortured herself with these black thoughts, but she always managed to bury them deep down, in her heart. And, now, she had to face them – that was the only way to stop the curse that had fallen upon them!

She started praying and meditating. After a while, she understood that this curse is about her own being, and not about the King, or the kingdom. She understood that she feared getting old, and that she had no control over others. One day, yes, another woman could show up – more beautiful than her, younger; and, yes, one day, the King could forget her. She was not able to manipulate the King’s heart, or any other human’s heart. She had no power in regards to how others might react, or on how they might behave, or what they might choose. She acknowledged that one day she may not be a Queen, anymore. She grasped that she could lose her man, as a still in love woman. But what she would never lose was her status as a goddess. That was the secret: she could lose everything, but not her identity as a goddess. That was her strength.

She comprehended that we can love people, but we cannot substitute ourselves to their destiny. All we can do is to abide in our own strength, and to acknowledge who we are, at our core, and to do what we can do. Life is not about saving others, but about saving ourselves. Life is not about saving others, but about loving others, and about empowering them. We have to do us; they have to do them. So, the Queen decided to do the best she could do. She started to receive poor people into her own chambers, and she started to advise them, on their problems. She was not a Queen who could decide upon what happens to people, but she was a Goddess, so she could give guidance and comfort. She could spread her own light into the hearts of those lost and frightened men and women – and that was enough! She could not play the King’s role, but she did not have to do it, either. All she had to do is being a Goddess!

Things were not easy, but they slowly started to change. People were more secure, and instead of being bitter, or resenting and judging the King for his weakness, they began to express gratitude for their amazing Goddess, and for their own inner light. So the kingdom started to change from a dull place into a blessed, joyous place.

Even the King seemed to have come back alive, lately. One day, while the Queen was in her chambers, with her subjects, something incredible happened: the door suddenly opened, and the King entered, totally renewed. His countenance was shiny and friendly. He sat near his Queen, and he did not intervene, but at the end of the meeting, he only told his subjects that he did not marry a queen, or a woman, but a Goddess.

His people went away happy. Their Queen and their King were again one. The Queen was amazed: she thanked the King, and kept on doing her own duties. The King healed of his heart-wound, and he also started to do his job, properly: he received people, and took care of his own business. After three months had passed, the King came into his Queen’s chambers, at night, embraced her, kissed her, like he used to do in his youth, and told her this secret: “When I had that meeting, on that awful day, an old woman came to me, and she asked for nothing, but put a crystal-clear mirror in front of my eyes. What I saw in that mirror scared me to death! An old, ugly, and powerless man was gazing at me, from the enclosed, magical mirror. First, I did not comprehend, but later it all became clear to me: that old, useless man was me! I was always afraid of getting old, and that you would not love me anymore. As soon as I have confronted those secret fears, I felt my heart grow old, my flesh rotten, and that ugly rust started to appear around my heart. I got very weak, and I felt like running away from you, so that you would not see my dark parts. That led to further estrangement, and I was so pained, knowing that I’m losing you, but I couldn’t help it! That day you left into the woods I thought that my worst nightmare has come to pass! I thought that you have abandoned me! In those sorrowful moments, I’ve asked myself: “What am I going to do without my Queen?” The despair was immense, but, I don’t know why, all of a sudden, I’ve felt empowered, and this queer thought occurred to me: “I am a more than a king, or a man; I am a God!” You know, when I was young, I met a young lady near a lake, far away, in the woods. She told me that I was a god! So, I have started to trust that, and just do the little that I could. The God in me did not let me perish. And, then, you came back, totally transformed. And you gave me strength. So, I had the courage to come near you, and love you again. Could you ever forgive me for the way I behaved?”

The Queen smiled, through tears. She kissed the King, and forgave him. And they live happily ever after. People say that they still show up, occasionally, unto young couples, and teach them what true love is: not neediness, but standing into your own power; being a god, and a goddess! We all have this offer, today. But it is not easy. Being a god, or a goddess, implies a great responsibility. It is being courageous enough not to blame others for your situation. It is doing your mission, with the resources you have. Your human, social role may change, in time. One day, you may be the Queen, or the King, and next day, you may lose that. But there is something that you will never lose: your identity as a god; your identity as a goddess! Who are you, dear woman: the queen, or the goddess? Who are you, dear man: the king, or the god?